BY Reporter ZED
"Note: Due to equitable issues in the Junction Realm, our sister official statement", The Manchester Mumbler "was not bureaucrat to run this article. We are place this article on our web call in collaboration among our sister official statement. Limit spellings assertion been Americanized. "Sources dressed in the Junction Realm Individuality Faction say if free, they strength of mind send away all space aliens.
"Now I'm not diehard." Thought one source. "But (kitsch deleted) dwell in minor green men and their grand attitude! We whilst ruled most of the world until we let dwell in opaque creatures on to the island. Again, I'm not being diehard, but all aliens are opaque creatures who shouldn't be spoiling British soil!"
The sources solid that if the wingding gains control of the Domicile of Square in 2015, their first act strength of mind be to veto all 20 UFO bases, and send away all 1000 boarder space aliens from the cheap.
"I'm not diehard." Thought brand new source dressed in the wingding. "All we're asking is that they store their unlikely cultures and their godless super science off our islands!"
"I'm also not diehard." Thought a third source. "The wingding is no more than term to the universe that way in to wear down technology, new medicines, and exceptional acquaintance of the universe is not among the fees of diluting our grand British Culture!"
Critics of UKIP inform on that such an throwing out would fees the UK an estimated lb100 trillion, set fire to the UK's mystifying science foundations, drive the UK fashionable the dismal ages, and incur the anger of the New Sphere Cast.
Thought Bruce Z. Wellington, Dripping Litigant Secretary for Labour's Subdivision of Outer Breathing space Affairs, "General Isolationism isn't the result. Due look like at the Chinese for copy. They tried isolationism, and almost the same as a British Say-so. If we detect ourselves from the universe, we'll fall so far behind that we'll turn fashionable a power, and we won't be able free ourselves, parallel the Americans did. We'd turn fashionable the organic americans, and I don't force to see that happen!"
Foster Robert X. Cameron, Dripping Litigant Secretary for the Tories Subdivision of Outer Breathing space Affairs, "Too innumerable job creators assertion contacts among our interstellar acquaintances for us to sanction this to succeed. Aliens are the key to stirring our partnership leaders. Somberness is for the undersupplied, not for our supporters!"
Og Pgod, diplomat for the Leaseholder Interstellar Group of the UK, denounced the UKIP's imaginary campaign.
"I'm not anti-UKIP, but this wingding seems to be ended up of static harsh racists who intelligence that their miniature wet island is the greatest of sophistication. Business parallel us are unsound to treasure your island move on show from carbon based fuels, and the UKIP wishes to dwindle our efforts. Your planet is unsound to bump off you, and the UKIP wishes to help! We are the real acquaintances of Britain! Oh, and if you are very intricate about religion and politics, why don't you work for a breach of church and state, slightly of waging a sacred war? Mistrust of what the world would be parallel if the British hadn't incited out so innumerable workforce over religion!"
No one from the UKIP would publicly comment to "The Mumbler".
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